Summer is slowly slipping away as the cool breeze of Autumn air touches our face. We breathe in and exhale as we look forward to the end of the pandemic tunnel. The cold season has officially started, yet we  are hopeful that everything is starting to go back to normal.

In the Netherlands, all covid restrictions have been lifted, provided that you have proof of vaccination. We are clearly moving towards going back to normal. But we are all aware that the new “normal” will feel different. We may not experience the same things that we enjoy pre-pandemic time.

The pandemic have brought some good things to us. We have prioritised only the things that make us happy, less instant gratification and more of long term happiness. We were forced to save more during this year long pandemic due to limitations and restrictions. A lot of restrictions have been an opportunity for us to reevaluate our priorities. 

From our side, the past three months are a rollercoaster of emotions. We were trying to buy our first home in the middle of a pandemic. Risky, but it was the right time for us. The government have implemented laws to waive property transfer taxes in favour for younger people/families to be able to afford a starter house. Everything fell into place as our savings were now enough for us to afford our first house in the Netherlands.

Despite this opportunity, it has been a struggle as the housing market is crazier. There is a lot of demand and very scarce supply of homes. A lot of people have taken this chance to make profit. After a lot of endless viewings and rejections, with a stroke of luck, our bid offer for a house was accepted.

I feel like after the house purchase, we are slowly integrating and getting acclimated in the Netherlands. We are now starting our lives and looking forward for the future. We have firmly planted our base and nurturing our family to grow and thrive. 

Busy times in this colder season, I am hopeful that I can get more motivation in the succeeding months of 2021. Anxiety and writer’s block will soon dissipate from my mind, and a clearer picture for what the future lies will soon form. 2021 is almost over, we are trying to savour the few remaining months, making more memories.

What are your thoughts on “post-pandemic” normal now that everything is opening up?

March marks the anniversary of COVID-19 making its way into Europe. We never expected the pandemic to last the whole year. It feels as if the pandemic has robbed us a year of life. As we look back on all the things that happened during the pandemic, we can say that "We are almost there, but not quite yet".

The pandemic is something that will go down in history. It is as if we were taken for a rollercoaster ride inside a haunted mansion. Everyone in the world was at their feet, and some may have triggered their anxieties, resulting in the Mental Health movement.

Despite all the horrific experiences we had this past year, I can say that there are some good things that came out of it. Here are some of the things I have pondered on:

- The whole world closed down, forcing everyone into isolation. Meaning, Mother Earth was able to take care of itself and heal. The carbon footprint is low. Towns that are forced into Commercialization have been able to breathe and recuperate. Globalization and Commercialization have taken their toll on Mother Earth, hence the several abnormalities we are experiencing, i.e global warming, climate change, frequent calamities, etc..

- Climate change was inevitable and widely felt.  We experienced snow in the Netherlands, twice! Some countries were not prepared for the sudden changes in nature (snow in Texas and worst flash flood in a lot of countries).

- We were able to save up more money. Essential stores are the only thing open, so we are forced to spend just on essentials. In other parts of the world, online shopping has been all in rage, yet we were on our toes and retail therapy did not appeal much to ease our pandemic anxieties. 

- Relationships are tested as we are forced into isolation. Our lives here revolved around just the three of us. For us, it was a positive thing because both of us are introverts. I know that is not the case with other people, especially extroverted ones. A year of almost nonexistent interaction with other people can trigger anxieties and depression. That is why Mental Health is in the spotlight. A lot of people had have a decline in their mental state. 

We are now in a state where we are itching to get vaccinated and move on to our new normal lives. We can't wait for everything to open up. We want everyone to recover and learn from this experience. I know this is a hopeful wish, as this pandemic is still far from over until most of the population in the world gets vaccinated.  

How was your year into the pandemic so far?

 2020, you sure are working hard.

I won't go further on how 2020 has been a haunted rollercoaster. Every month has been a surprise and it is safe to say that everyone is barely holding and are just done with it.

We prayed for a peaceful yuletide season, yet here we are on our second lockdown, a REAL one. The Netherlands is on lockdown from December 15 until January 19. Everything is closed, except stores with essential items, including schools and daycares. Christmas was cancelledt. All holiday plans were halted. 

But despite all of that, as a true-blooded Filipino, we learn to adapt. We chose to see the silver lining despite all the complaints of all the dampened spirits. We tried to make our home as cozy as possible, decorating it to our heart's content so the spirit of Christmas will rub on. We do that until we forget, for a moment, that we are still DEEP in the pandemic. 

My family is still grateful because we are in a state where everything is okay for us. We were not hit hard. We had a low-key pleasant Christmas. All of us are still healthy. I know that is not the case for everyone, and for that, I acknowledge that we are on the privileged side. It may not sound pleasant, but that is the only thought that kept me sane throughout this year. I constantly remind myself to be grateful, for I know a lot of people have it worst, yet they are still fighting each day. 

On a lighter note, I wish everyone a Merry Christmas! Let us all pray that the light at the end of this pitch-black tunnel will be seen in 2021. We got this! Let's claim it!

What are you hoping for in 2021?
Let's discuss this in the comment box!

Normally November is a prelude from the festivities that will commence before the year ends. But being in 2020, it is safe to assume that everyone wants the year to be over. Apart from living with the pandemic COVID-19 for most of the year, there are still unfortunate natural phenomenas that had made people’s anxiety over the roof. 

Living in the Netherlands, we are included in the list of countries in Europe that went on partial lockdown for most of November. Our neighbour countries went on full lockdown. Festivities in the country have been cancelled, including the much awaited Sint Martin, Sinterklaas and Christmas Markets.

In the Philippines, the country have been struck by, not just one, but two succeeding typhoons which caused flooding in most regions. But despite all these negative things happening around, November is still the month we look back and think of the things we are thankful for before the year ends. 

I am thankful that my family here (and also in the Philippines) are safe. My in-laws were stuck by the harsh typhoons, leaving their house in a devastating state. Despite that, we are still thankful they are safe. We can help them rebuilt things that was destroyed, but nothing compares to their safe well-being.

I am thankful that we are in a country that has put us in a place of privilege. My husband and I kept having the conversation about “What if we were still in the Philippines raising our child?” I am grateful because my anxiety cannot handle all the stressors that the Philippines are having now. Living in the Netherlands is hard for us, but still it is better to struggle here. I can see myself going crazy if we were still raising our child in the Philippines. I know as a Filipino, we are built to be resilient, adapt to changes and live with it. But emotionally and psychologically, one cannot handle that much stressful environment. 

I am still praying that December will be a peaceful month. Hopefully we can still feel the spirit of the yuletide season as we ease out of 2020. Including in my prayers that we see the light at the end of this tunnel of craziness in 2021. 

What are you thankful for this 2020?

Let’s share nice stories in the comments below

Wake me up when September COVID-19 ends.




But 2020 is quite a year, as if my year cannot get any weirder. These last five years of my life was all about changes, one after another. As I grow old, my resilience and adaptability to change have been stagnant and on a downward slope. I realised that I wanted something permanent, which is quite impossible nowadays. Life will always throw a curveball, and often times, it always hit me in the face, HARD.

I was looking forward to summer and basking in the sun, yet COVID-19 had different plans. And now, I can feel the familiar cold and gray skies looming over. It’s gonna ba a long and very cold 6 months again. I know I mentioned that I love the cold weather, but what I really want is the spring season. Spring is a nice mix of cold wind and sunshine with a low chance of rain. But COVID-19 came and spring was out of the picture.



Despite all the panic and hysteria happening in the world now, we managed to get a quick break and got recharged. We decided to explore the Netherlands on my birthday. I planned a one week vacation, and it was tiring and the same time fun.

Last year we went to Paris and Disneyland on my birthday. It was nice and fun coz Paris is dreamy. I would have like to go back and explore Paris more (even make it a yearly birthday trip!). This year, we went to Efteling and stayed at their vacation park Bosrijk. It was fun for my son for he can’t stop talking about the rides he wanted to go ride on. I can say we had a full unique Efteling experience.


Despite the anxiety panics I had since COVID-19 came, I am still grateful that I have another year to live. Getting older physically and mentally have been slowly creeping in on me. I am back in a maze where I look desperately lost. They say that you get wiser as you grow old. I want to note that as you grow older, you get more impatient. You notice everything is slowing down (or you are actually slowing down).

I guess what I am trying to say to myself is that I need to focus on these three things this year.


1. Be Patient.
Good things take time. Being patient nowadays is a test of virtue. The world is spinning faster every year, and if you always try to keep up, you’ll end up being crazy (or unhappy). Set goals and be patient. Results will not come in an instant, but it will. You have to be mentally well when that happens.


2. You are in charge of your life.
There are a lot of things to complain about, it never ends. But you are the only one who can change the narrative of your life. I know life sucks now, it is cold and COVID-19 makes it much worse. But what are you gonna do about it? It is what you do with the situation that will define the turn of events in your life. Do your best with what you have and was given to you.


3. Hang in there
It may get harder and harder each day, but hang in there. A lot of things will not turn out the way you want it, and its okay. Resilience have been in your Filipino blood. You are like clay, you can be moulded into something useful. You may turn out to be something amazing after a few years. Just continue putting in the work, even though the light is still nowhere to be found. It will come, one day. HANG IN THERE!



If you reached the end of this post, CONGRATULATIONS! I always write these musing every year whenever my birthday comes. I know it’ll be a pain to read through my haywired thoughts. It is the side effect of getting old. ^_^

Share your thoughts in the comments below!

• I brushed up my Dutch and moved forward to the second tower in Duolingo

I am aware that I need to learn Dutch to integrate into society (and start making local friends), but the language is complicated. The inverse sentences and the guttered phonics makes it hard for my deteriorating aged brain. The difference from the American English that I knew my whole life was too broad.

Screenshot of my milestone!